May 19, 2024

The X Spot: Spider-Man: Reign Isn’t Terrible. Seriously.

Will Nevin025 mins

For the last few months, I’ve been averaging 10+ miles per day on my runs. Hold your applause, please — it’s not so much an accomplishment as it is daring my body to fall to pieces on me. (My body has not done so to date. The coward.) But I was thinking earlier today with all of my aches and pains and stiffness: Is this what Batman would feel like? Would he get out of bed and shamble to the start of his day, waiting for his body to loosen up? Would his feet generally ache?

If so, does that make me Batman?

These are the things I think about.

The Bottom (at the Top)

10. Chained to the Grave #1. Writers: Andy Eschenbach and Brian Level, Artist: Kate Scherron, Letterer: Micah Myers, Publisher: IDW

Visually, Chained to the Grave is a bubbly, electric ride in pinks and purples and dusty yellows; the colors pop with life and energy, and it’s one of the most pleasing books to sit down and open. But it is a tough thing to read — what little story that happens to roam about is told in flashback, and the dialogue is mostly a series of broken one-liners. This should be more fun than it is, and it’s a shame it’s such a slog.  

Other Books of Ill-Repute    

9. Redemption #1. Writer: Christa Faust, Artist: Mike Deodato Jr., Colorist: Lee Loughridge, Letterer: Steve Wands, Publisher: AWA

A post-apocalyptic punk feminist Western? Why the fuck not. “Redemption” has some neat ideas at play — like “Waterworld” without the water and some Linda Hamilton badassery instead of … whatever it is Kevin Costner does — but it’s a bit rough ’round the edges, like it’s too talky in some spots and not talky enough in others. Also, the lettering doesn’t hit quite right, and speaking of Hamilton, the lead character’s face looks awfully familiar here. I guess there are only so many tough and older women in sci-fi, right? *shrug emoji* 

8. Black of Heart #1. Writer: Christopher Charlton, Art and lettering: David Hollenbach, Publisher: Source Point Press

I like everything about this book — the 1940s noir vibe, the homicide dick in a bad marriage saddled with a drunk partner, the black-and-white-and-spot color art (my favorite coloring gimmick, by the way). But this gem of a thing is stuck down here in the dregs because I don’t know if I’ll ever see another issue thanks to the shittiness of comiXology and the nigh impossibilities of running a small independent publisher like Source Point. I can’t subscribe to the series on the Jeff Bezos Memorial Rounding Error, and this is the only issue available there, even though I know at least #2 and #3 have hit comic shops. (At least according to that one tweet I saw from that random guy. #journalism #sources.) With more resources, I feel like this could be a slick, smash success. But that’s not the way of these things.   

Do WWE Fans Know What They Want?

In the immediate aftermath of 47-year-old Adam “Edge” Copeland’s win in the main event/titular match of Sunday’s Royal Rumble, there were two visible points in the social media consensus:

  1. Bianca Belair, the winner of the women’s Rumble, was a good pick for a main event spot at Wrestlemania.
  2. Edge is too old, and WWE should find new acts to push.

Those points at the outset are not contradictory — one celebrates the new and fresh, while the other decries the old and stale. But to hold out one match and its finish as good WWE decision making and to fault the other is to misunderstand what leads to someone pushing 50 getting top billing in Vince McMahon’s showcase of the year.

To begin, there’s nothing wrong with Belair — she’s as good (if not better) than any other choice to win the women’s Rumble, and any move that keeps charisma chasm Charlotte Flair lingering lower on the card is a good one. But the match itself was fundamentally flawed, specifically its overreliance on comedy at the expense of demeaning the whole enterprise. Billie Kay sucked up a great deal of time and attention at the beginning of the match working her dead end “why can’t I find a partner?!” gimmick, but that wasn’t the most damaging bit — that would come some two-thirds of the way into the Rumble when R-Truth and the rest of the 24/7 geek squad ran into the match and its focus for a fleeting — but still damaging — moment.

Whatever the purpose behind the 24/7 Championship — whether it was simply to create content for the interminable three-hour Raw or to evoke the warm memories of the Hardcore Championship — it’s a joke and has been since almost the moment of its introduction. It exists now only for comedy with the central title holder R-Truth serving as not much more than a racist caricature. The inclusion of the titles and its hapless pursuers into any serious proceeding is a taint, and if you don’t think so, picture this: It’s down to the final four in the Rumble, and let’s say it’s Stone Cold, Shawn Michaels, The Rock and Undertaker (or pick your legends or whatever wrestlers you think should be protected today). Do you think Vince allows for the misfits and nitwits to interrupt that match? If you don’t do it in the dream hypothetical, you don’t do it in the real product, because this — the pursuit of titles and winning matches — should matter. There can be personalities and silliness and whatever else you want, but it can’t be all up and down the card, because when you do that — when you bring R-Truth into the middle of a match designed to select what should be framed as one of the main event participants of Wrestlemania — the whole goddamned thing starts to break down.

And that’s why 47-year-old Edge is challenging for one of the company’s main titles in the biggest show of the year.

Right now, the men’s side of the WWE main roster is Roman Reigns, Edge, Drew McIntyre (when he’s not stooging for the company) and an endless list of caricatures, devalued assets and wrestlers who would be better served working for someone else, the sad, logical endpoint of McMahon’s modern day approach of not building stars and not paying attention to characterization or anything else he sees as insignificant details. Reigns and Edge are protected and have been for the last year. Their characters aren’t comedy fodder, they don’t associate with lower card jobbers and they haven’t been mired in programs in which they simply trade wins with another act similarly going nowhere.

Edge matters. Reigns matters. The best — and only — play is to match them up in the short window that both are in the right face/heel slot.

And if you don’t like that — if you want to see someone like Matt Riddle or Keith Lee get into the main event scene — ask yourself: What do you really want in professional wrestling? Is it simply to laugh at an unending stream of meaningless gags with one-dimensional characters and enjoy outcomes that don’t mean anything? Or do you want a wider array of stories that matter and matches with stakes?     

You have to decide. 

Because you can’t have them both.  

The Bits in the Middle

7. Star Trek: Hell’s Mirror. Writer: J.M. DeMatteis, Artist: Matthew Dow Smith, Colorist: Candice Han, Letterer: Neil Uyetake, Publisher: IDW

“Space Seed”-era Khan is a fascinating figure, the allure of a cult leader combined with the murderous tendencies of … well, a cult leader. It’s no great shock that eventually some writer or editor or combination of the two got the idea to take this character and place him in Trek’s Mirror Universe, the realm of thirsty goatees, torture and unbridled lust for power. What unfolds is a series of moves and countermoves between Khan, Mirror Spock and Mirror Kirk that ultimately demonstrates that we are never quite as separated from the worst aspects of our base instincts as we might like. Fun read. 

6. Fear Case #1. Writer: Matt Kindt, Artist: Tyler Jenkins, Colorist: Hilary Jenkins, Publisher: Dark Horse

Part police procedural, part riff on The Ring (which was kind of a horror police procedural but it was scary as shit, I remember that), Fear Case is about the Secret Service’s oldest outstanding case … about a literal case … that might kill you, a person you hate or a person you love. (The three true outcomes of murder, if you will.) It’s out there as hell, but if you accept some of its more eccentric elements (such as the aforementioned three true outcomes and why exactly this is a case for the Secret Service), it might be fun for you. 

5. Spider-Man: Reign. Writer and artist: Kaare Andrews, Colorist: Jose Villarrubia, Publisher: Marvel

When your reputation is “the book where Spidey’s spunk gives MJ the cancer that kills her,” it’s hard to be anything other than a punchline. But — and maybe this is the “Future State” fatigue talking here — Reign is more than that and flashes some real creativity in imagining what it would take to drag (quite literally) an elderly Peter Parker back into the fight. I like the world, I like the characters (JJJ as a hermit-cum-street preacher is delightful) and I like the resolution that sees Parker angling for the Good Death that all superheroes deserve. It’s no masterpiece, but look at it this way: If you gave me Year One, Dark Knight Returns and Reign as three and only three comics and told me to rank ’em, that’s the order I would put them in. But there’s more of a gap between one and two than two and three.   

X Spotlight: Things on ComicsXF You Should Read

Getting Creamier

4. Super Friends #1. Writer: E. Nelson Bridwell, Artists: Ric Estrada, Joe Orlando and Vince Colletta, Colorist: Jerry Serpe, Letterer: Milt Snapinn, Publisher: DC

For a few months now, DC has slowly been releasing issues of the 1976-81 run of “Super Friends” on the JBMRE (Stay sharp, Loyal Content Consumer), and I’ve been meaning to give it a try. Why? I’m not sure, probably my affection for Batman ’66 mixed with an appreciation for the way Tom Peyer is able to lovingly spoof the era and those that came before it in The Wrong Earth. Friends, I wasn’t disappointed in the least in a story that starred the Penguin and other baddies (who recruited their own junior associates!) as they attempted to steal giant robot parts. Comics are great. 

3. Future State: Harley Quinn #2. Writer: Stephanie Phillips, Artists: Simone Di Meo and Toni Infante, Colorist: Tamara Bonvillain, Letterer: Troy Peteri, Publisher: DC

“Arkham Knights” — the Next Batman backup by Paul Jenkins — has been my favorite “Future State” read, but Harley Quinn is a strong No. 2 owing to the cinematic art and a better presentation of Harley-as-criminologist than what the Murphyverse is currently spitting out. I’m sad that this team and this look won’t be continuing in the regular ongoing (maybe a return in Future State: Gotham?), but Harley is at least in good hands with Phillips. 

2. Piecemeal. Writer: Cullen Bunn, Artist and colorist: Szymon Kudranski, Letterer: Marshall Dillon, Publisher: AfterShock

Piecemeal is a simple concept done well: Teens on a “one last hurrah before we all split up” go into a spook house, and bad shit goes down after they walk in the door. It’s not complicated, it’s not overwritten and it doesn’t overstay its welcome at about 50 pages. (It’s also appropriately priced at $6.99.) This is the horror equivalent of a masterfully done fart joke: If you can’t enjoy this, there’s something wrong with you.  

The Out of ConteXt X: Choice ComicsXF Discord Quotes

  • “the real question is does that make the phoenix force a milf”
  • “I wouldn’t mind more followers, but like I just tweet about the Arrowverse shows.”
  • “Let’s prank a Chili’s in Montana!”
  • “horses have 400,000 blood types but they can have more in international waters”
  • “Jared Leto will actually murder someone to get into a role and then the movie gets 20% Rotten Tomatoes”
  • “Folks who hate glob must be so sad”
  • “what the fuck, horses”
  • “same thing i do every week, pinky: every x book and immortal hulk”*
  • “every time rick appears i am more disgusted and enamored by him. Baby girl you smell like quarters”
  • “I for one can’t stand wrenches.”

*Will’s note: This was before the fucked up anti-Semitic shit.

Wanna get in on the madness that is the ComicsXF Discord? Back our Patreon.

Finally, the Big Hoss of the Week

1. Man-Bat #1. Writer: Dave Wielgosz, Artist: Sumit Kumar, Colorist: Romulo Fajardo Jr., Letterer: Tom Napolitano, Publisher: DC

I like my Batman like I like my coffee: strong, uncomplicated and with as few drones as possible, and this was a classic Batman story, only with the perspective shifted to Kirk Langstrom/Man-Bat. It’s not as complex as Immortal Hulk, at least not yet (although given that this is only a six-issue miniseries, I’m not expecting some seismic tonal shift), but it’s still a great read — one that feels surprisingly grounded given our immediate dearth of mainline, Magistrate-free Batbooks.   

NeXt Time on the X Spot

Future State: Green Lantern #2, DC Love Is A Battlefield, Radiant Black #1 and seven more … because it’s pronounced “ten.”

Will Nevin

Will Nevin loves bourbon and AP style and gets paid to teach one of those things. He is on Twitter far too often.

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